Self-coaching to end suffering.
Written by Sophie Parienti
Byron Katie is an author and speaker famous for her coaching method called “The Work.” It is a self-reflection method that allows us to stop believing and identify with our thoughts to free ourselves from the suffering they can create.
The advantages of this method are, on the one hand, that it is very effective and, on the other hand, that each one of us can put it into practice immediately.
Below find the three significant steps of Byron’s methodology:
Step 1: Put your upset mind on paper.
Immerse yourself in the feeling of a situation that is distressing to you and point the finger of blame outward. Identify the thoughts and feelings of this experience and write them down spontaneously. Let your mind express all your beliefs, judgments, and interpretations on the subject without restriction.
Step 2: Question your statements.
Here, it is about questioning your statements from the first step. To do this, you need to ask yourselves the following questions and take the time to answer them as truthfully as possible.
- Is what I am saying true? (Yes or no. If no, move to question 3).
- How can I be sure that it is 100% true?
- When I believe this thought, how do I react? What happens?
- If I did not have this thought, what would happen? Who would I be?
Step 3: Turn your statements around.
This step involves asserting the exact opposite of each statement. By turning your thinking around, you will realize that it works better for you and is probably more honest and accurate than your initial thinking.
Identifying and challenging the thoughts responsible for your suffering and turning them around will significantly improve your relationships with yourself and others and the quality of your life!
To learn more about this method, I recommend reading Bryon Katie’s book, “The Work.”
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